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A Sigh Of Relief

by Courtney on June 21, 2011

I think sometimes I can be a bit dramatic.

Yes, I know…shocking.

But I can’t help but feel like that’s sort of what I was being today, dramatic.

You know that whole anxious thing? The knots in my stomach?

Well, it was because I had to go back and face the school I was working in three months ago…to pick up the rest of my stuff.

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When I first lost my teaching job, I went into the school that following weekend with Jay and my parents to clean out most of the stuff from my classroom. I even blogged about itI just didn’t tell you exactly what I was doing.

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But when I was cleaning out the room, I knew there were things that the kids were still using and I really didn’t want to disrupt them anymore than they were already going to be. So I decided to leave a handful of things there for the students…

Posters, calendars, and my magnet boards, to name a few.

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****FYI: Parents & Teachers: If you go into the auto section at WalMart and look for oil drip pans, you can get them for probably $9-$10, and they are completely magnetic. They are GREAT for doing spelling, alphabet, and word work activities, and are also a great way to have students sign in/sign up for lunch each day. Smile

But mainly, I had to pick up the rest of my books.

Over the years, I’ve accumulated a lot of books. Like, a.lot.of.books. You remember the Scholastic Book Orders from when you were in elementary school right? Well if you thought you loved them as a kid…they’re even better when you’re a teacher.

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So I gathered my belongings, and even got to see my former students for the last five minutes of their day. I swear some of them grew a foot since I last saw them. And boy, I’ll tell ya, they do a really good job of making me feel like some sort of celebrity.

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As soon as I saw them, all of my anxiousness immediately subsided, and I was put much more at ease. I knew it would happen this way; this is how I have reacted to things all my life. I build up the anticipation to the point where I make myself nauseous, and then once it happens, it’s no big deal.

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I was able to talk with some of my former co-workers, which was nice, and I was also able to ask some of the questions that I’ve been wanting answered for three months now. Unfortunately, my answers were pretty craptastic, but I was at least able to get the things off of my chest that I wanted to. Hence, my overwhelming nerves.

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Maybe one of these days I’ll get more into the details of the whole ordeal, but for now, I’m going to try my best to put it all behind me and continue to move forward. There’s no sense in dwelling on the past, and I know I’ve got big things in store for me. I can feel it.

Now only time will tell where I end up next. Smile

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{ 56 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Courtney @ The Granola Chronicles June 21, 2011 at 6:35 pm

Courtney, you have shown so much strength and positivity over these past few months. Losing your job obviously wasn’t the most ideal situation, but I feel like you truly made the most of it. I believe we are in control of our happiness, and you’re a prime example!

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2 Colleen @ The Lunchbox Diaries June 21, 2011 at 6:36 pm

I was right! :) I’m so glad it turned out well!!
Colleen @ The Lunchbox Diaries recently posted..Bruschetta Inspired Chicken

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3 Lindsay June 21, 2011 at 6:53 pm

Courtney, you are such an inspiration! I’ve been reading for a while and you have shown so much courage and kept things upbeat in your life (at least for the blogging part that you let us see) and I think that is so admirable! You will absolutely do great things in your life. I know this may not mean a whole lot, but you really were one of the main reasons I decided to start a blog- and already it has impacted my life in more ways than I could have imagined (all positive). I want to thank you so much for that! Oh, and the scholastic book fairs that we used to have were the best.thing.ever! I kind of miss them :)

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4 Blog is the New Black June 21, 2011 at 6:54 pm

You did it! ;) I had a feeling that’s what you were doing. Sorry you had to face it, but you are done with it! Good job! xo
Blog is the New Black recently posted..Hawaiian Grilled Pork Chops with Pineapple Couscous

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5 Katelyn June 21, 2011 at 7:04 pm

Courtney,

I applaud you for being so strong! Everything happens for a reason. That is what I always tell myself when things don’t go the way I had wanted. Don’t worry. What is meant to be will happen! I know there is a class out there waiting for you to be their teacher! Keep smiling :)

Katelyn

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6 Gina @ Running to the Kitchen June 21, 2011 at 7:18 pm

I had a feeling it was about going back to school. Glad you survived and enjoyed seeing the kids so much!
Gina @ Running to the Kitchen recently posted..Bloggers Greek festival

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7 Jessica @ brighteyesandbushytales June 21, 2011 at 7:30 pm

That must have been so so hard. I would have had a pit in my stomach all day too and I probably would have put off picking up my things for about as long as possible. Good for you for being so strong and facing your fears! :)
Jessica @ brighteyesandbushytales recently posted..Recipe Toolbox

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8 Chocolate, Cheese and Wine June 21, 2011 at 7:41 pm

Courtney – I am the same way! I will think about something until I get completely anxious and even sick to my stomach – I hate it. Sometimes, you just need to let things go. I’m so glad you were able to get your “sigh of relief” :)
Chocolate, Cheese and Wine recently posted..Monday is ALWAYS Wing Night!

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9 chelsey @ clean eating chelsey June 21, 2011 at 8:21 pm

I knew it had something to do with school. I tink, though, it would have been AWESOME if you would have taken a shot of tequila beforehand and hown up a little bit tipsy to school. Just sayin’… :)

Just a question – did your school go year round? It’s crazy they are still in school right now if now!
chelsey @ clean eating chelsey recently posted..crazy day at the vegan cafe

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10 Courtney June 21, 2011 at 9:19 pm

Haha, I REALLY thought about that tequila! ;)
No, they don’t go year round. Thursday is the last day.

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11 Lauren June 21, 2011 at 8:28 pm

Thanks for sharing about your teaching experience! As an inspiring teacher I loved this post a little bit more than the rest (although, that’s tough to say!). This might be too much to ask, but I’d love it if you could do a post or 2 about tips, tricks and ideas you’ve come across as a teacher. Thanks– you’re so great!

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12 Lauren June 21, 2011 at 8:29 pm

*aspiring– whoops!

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13 Cait @ Urban Fencepost June 21, 2011 at 8:29 pm

I’m sure that must have been hard, but I’m glad you pushed through the nerves. It’s nice that the kids were happy to see you and helped ease some of your anxiousness.

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14 Samantha June 21, 2011 at 8:36 pm

I can completely understand why you were so anxious earlier today, I do the exact same thing. But you showed strength and you did it.

You have been so chipper and positive since losing your job – you’re such a happy fun person! You’re going to be great no matter where life’s journey may take you next!
Samantha recently posted..Back on the Wagon Day 35

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15 Mary @ Bites and Bliss June 21, 2011 at 8:40 pm

I truly believe when one door closes, another opens. I love your positivity..and really, the change may be a good thing. We can’t grow as people without change, anyway!

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16 Andrea @ Onion in My Hair June 21, 2011 at 8:44 pm

Courtney – I know a lot of teachers who have gone through what I can only assume to be very similar situations.

I am so sorry that you were riding an emotional roller coaster this afternoon. But you have the right attitude, girl!

Onward and upward!
Andrea @ Onion in My Hair recently posted..Meatless Monday- Orzo Stuffed Peppers

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17 Alexa @ SimpleEats June 21, 2011 at 8:55 pm

Aw, Courtney! I’m so glad your ball of nerves went away, I’m sure your kids were so excited to see you. There’s definitely something great on the horizon for you!
Alexa @ SimpleEats recently posted..Don’t Be Alarmed

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18 Gloria June 21, 2011 at 9:05 pm

I don’t think you were being dramatic at all. I have so much respect for you for going back there and showing how strong, positive, and incredible you truly are. You have such a great attitude and I don’t think I could have had the courage to do what you did today.

Keep the good attitude, I know things are going to work out for you :)

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19 Julie H. of Spinach and Sprinkles June 21, 2011 at 9:20 pm

I don’t even know you and I’m proud of you. That had to have been *SUPER* hard. I feel like it is important to upfront and honest so you don’t regret anything, glad you got it out. Big things to come for you!!! :)
Julie H. of Spinach and Sprinkles recently posted..Hello world!

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20 Jordan P @ food, sweat, and beers June 21, 2011 at 9:36 pm

Wow, I can only imagine how hard that was, but I’m glad you went through with it… and also that you wrote about it.
Jordan P @ food, sweat, and beers recently posted..Six Pack Sunday

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21 Darcy Pogue June 21, 2011 at 9:38 pm

Courtney, I realized today, only briefly talking to you that I missed you more than I thought! It was good to see you there, where I thought you belonged. I can honestly say that I don’t know how I would feel if this happened to me and good for you for keeping your chin up! Good luck in any/all endavours you encounter in the future……..

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22 Courtney June 21, 2011 at 9:40 pm

Thank you, Darcy!!
I’ve been missing you guys like crazy…but it was so good to see you again. Maybe we can try to get together over the summer…ice cream?? :)

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23 Katherine June 21, 2011 at 9:54 pm

*GIANT HUG*
Katherine recently posted..Wordless Monday…

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24 Danica June 21, 2011 at 9:56 pm

I do the exact same thing as you, Courtney–I get so nervous for things that I get headaches and sometimes even feel nauseous, but then once that thing actually happens I make it through just fine….You should absolutely be proud of yourself for facing what you were so nervous about–that’s typically the hardest part–way to go!
I’m also in my senior year of college and an Ed. major. Unfortunately, there have been so many teachers losing their positions recently, and I’m so sorry you had that happen to you. But keep being positive–great things are absolutely in store for you!!

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25 Brittany June 21, 2011 at 9:58 pm

I’m so glad that today is over and you can close that door and move on. I definitely agree that big things are in store. Maybe even a speaking engagement at a conference or something along those lines. ;)

xoxo
Brittany recently posted..Loving Lehja

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26 Courtney June 21, 2011 at 10:12 pm

Funny you say that, Brittany… ;)

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27 Laura June 21, 2011 at 10:02 pm

That must have been so hard. As a teacher, the end of school is hard enough. You put so much time and effort into the students and the job, so I can’t imagine how it felt leaving midyear. Glad you were able to see the kids today though. I’m glad it seemed to go as well as it could have.
Laura recently posted..Peanut Butter Bars

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28 wizard June 21, 2011 at 10:12 pm

You resigned! Stop acting like you “lost” your job. Pathetic to try and elicit sympathy for something you did.

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29 Courtney June 21, 2011 at 10:31 pm

“Wizard” – unless you know the whole story of everything, then I’d appreciate it if you’d stop hiding behind your pseudo name and leaving unnecessary comments like this.

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30 BT June 21, 2011 at 10:50 pm

Obviously the story is a personal matter that may not be blog appropriate.

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31 Wizard June 22, 2011 at 2:09 pm

I agree, but if you are going to discuss on the blog how you “lost” your job, why not be truthful about what happened? Or, do not discuss it at all.

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32 I second that June 22, 2011 at 2:48 pm

I agree with Wizard on this

33 Julie @ PBFingers June 22, 2011 at 3:51 pm

it’s obvious that courtney’s job situation is personal. she basically HAD to blog about losing her job b/c readers noticed a change in her posting schedule and everyone was very confused as to why she wasn’t mentioning her students and a job that she loved anymore. if she wants to keep details of the situation private, i think that’s something that should be respected. i know i never revealed my employer on my blog or discussed personal work matters because of safety issues and concerns about HR/legal ramifications. if she says something negative about her employer it could be seen in a negative light should she choose to pursue employment with another company in the future and they find her blog.

34 Courtney June 22, 2011 at 4:28 pm

I am no longer discussing this matter on the blog. If it is really something you feel the need to discuss further, feel free to email me.

35 Claire June 21, 2011 at 10:14 pm

Loving your positivity Courtney! You are truly going to be wonderful at whatever you decide to do with that outlook! I’m glad that your day went better than expected, that’s always nice isn’t it?!
Claire recently posted..New Blogging Tactic!

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36 Sarah June 21, 2011 at 10:14 pm

You’re such a strong person. Times are incredibly tough right now, and wonderful teachers are losing jobs all over the nation. Unfortunately, it seems as though the people losing their jobs are the most passionate ones… our public school systems are in serious trouble.

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37 Beth Tollis June 21, 2011 at 10:35 pm

Courtney-
I am teacher up near Cleveland, and we have all sorts of funding issues, but nothing that went into immediate effect. I understand if you don’t want to blog about it, but I can’t make sense of what happened based on the little details presented. Doesn’t your school have a union? How can you lose a job mid year? Didn’t you sign a contract? So confused, but understand the devestation. I was moved from social studies to special education 3 years ago, to save another person’s job, and it has done a number on my positive attitude. Or lack of…Great to hear you’re hang in,

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38 Confused too June 22, 2011 at 11:09 am

Hi Courtney, I love your blog! Your comedic timing and positive attitude is wonderful. I too understand if you don’t want to share the details of what happened with your teaching position but am also confused? Maybe a topic for you to blog about? Will you pursue another teaching position?

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39 Liz @ iheartvegetables June 21, 2011 at 10:58 pm

I’m glad your anxiety was for nothing! I do the same thing, it’s ridiculous! Good job facing it though :) I hope everything is going well!

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40 Shayla June 21, 2011 at 11:05 pm

I really admire and applaud you for your strength and courage today. You had every right to be so anxious and nervous…I know I would have! Throughout everything you have maintained a very strong, positive attitude and outlook on everything and I commend you for that. Everything happens for a reason and I believe good things are definitely in store for you :)
Btw, I meant to mention in my email that you and your blog are one of the reasons that inspired me to start my own blog, so thank you! :)

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41 Juju June 21, 2011 at 11:14 pm

You are right when you say that you have big things in store for you! Sometimes, we need to fall to rise to a better place. I hope that you know, deep inside, that you are an inspiration, and a great woman. Never have fear, and just look ahead for your future! =]
Juju recently posted..Asian Baked Salmon

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42 Khushboo June 21, 2011 at 11:20 pm

Your positivity about the future and strength to deal with the present is amazing, Courtney! Although I don’t know you personally, I can tell that when they let you go, the school really made a big mistake! Stay strong!
Khushboo recently posted..23 years wiser

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43 Stephanie Bragg June 21, 2011 at 11:34 pm

I’m glad things went well, I can only imagine how tough that was. That’s so nice that you left your stuff for the kids to keep using.
Stephanie Bragg recently posted..I Need Therapy

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44 Liv @ The Salty n' Sweet June 21, 2011 at 11:44 pm

I always hate that feeling of having something unresolved. I’m sure it was seriously nerve-wracking, but I’m glad you at least tried to get some closure and move on! The kids must have missed you a lot, but what can you do? You’re definitely going to have great things coming to you, and your optimism will carry you through :)

And yes, I was obsessed with the Scholastic book fairs and order forms. I loved the Magic Tree House Series, and left my parents broke with how many books I ordered!
Liv @ The Salty n’ Sweet recently posted..A Run- At Last

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45 Amber @ Stop and Smell the Wildflowers June 22, 2011 at 12:44 am

It’s hard not knowing what is to come, but I can tell that you are a wonderful teacher (I am one, too, so I know what it takes- now if only someone would hire me even though I am a newbie teacher, hahaha).
And (if you are planning to continue teaching) you WILL find another job, and you WILL influence more lives and help those children achieve success in both their academic and personal lives. Stay positive, and know that things always work out the way they are supposed to. :)
Amber @ Stop and Smell the Wildflowers recently posted..Food

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46 courtney (pancakes and postcards) June 22, 2011 at 12:48 am

Courtney, you’re really inspiring. I love your positive attitude and am completely certain that what’s in store for you is gonna blow you away. :) you rock and thanks for sharing with us.

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47 Jamie aka "Sometimes Healthy Living Girl" June 22, 2011 at 1:15 am

I can only imagine how tough that must have been for you, but per usual, you handled a difficult situation with grace, poise and positivity. You amaze me every day with your ability to make the best of every moment. I am SURE something special is in store for you and you deserve it!
Jamie aka “Sometimes Healthy Living Girl” recently posted..25 Step Sometimes Healthy Comfort Food

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48 Erica June 22, 2011 at 7:34 am

I’m glad things went ok! I’m sure the best is yet to come for you!
Erica recently posted..First Post!

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49 Steph @ StephSnacks June 22, 2011 at 8:21 am

I’m so glad you were able to get through this. I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to go back to your former employers but you are much stronger than you think :) often times I find myself getting a bit more uneasy than I should about work-related situations. Sometimes I have to remind myself that staying calm is really the best answer.

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50 Katelyn @ Chef Katelyn June 22, 2011 at 8:27 am

Oh girl :( That is so hard. Especially after all of those months — I am so sorry that you’re sad, but girl, onwards and upwards! When one door closes, another one opens. You just have to figure out which one it is.

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51 Molly Carter June 22, 2011 at 8:45 am

Way to be strong, Courtney! You have such a positive outlook and attitude toward everything. I certainly agree with you…good things are coming your way! By the way, I have the same American flag border and government posters in my classroom. :)
Molly Carter recently posted..Baby Creme-Filled Cookie Sandwiches

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52 Holly June 22, 2011 at 11:44 am

You DEFINITELY have big things ahead of you!!
Love ya girl! xoxo

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53 Carol @ LuckyZucca June 22, 2011 at 2:09 pm

I’m glad you got through it, Courtney! Looks like you handled it with grace. Good for you!

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54 Shayla June 22, 2011 at 3:59 pm

re: above comments…Julie at PB Fingers couldn’t have said that any better, amen sista! The rest of us here support you and commend you for what you did and we’re all here for you….this will only make you stronger and you got great things that lie ahead for you :) xoxo

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55 Melissa June 22, 2011 at 7:09 pm

I can feel big things on deck for you too, Courtney. It’s a great feeling to have for yourself, isn’t it? Way to be brave and go back there. It couldn’t have been easy, but it sounds like you did it with grace and humility. You are one special lady and I am sure that great things are coming your way! XO

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56 kristen June 22, 2011 at 10:20 pm

sorry it wasnt the best day. But everything happens for a reason and big things are yet to come!

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